Adieu 2013

New Years is one of my favorite times of the year. The slate is wiped clean and everyone gets a fresh start at a brand new year. Everyone loves a second chance, right?

I'm saving the big obligatory 2014 resolution post for tomorrow, and instead today I'm taking a moment to say adieu to two thousand thirteen.

I'm not going to do the expected 'year in review'. I did spend time looking back a previous Year in Review posts {2010 and 2011} and smiled as the memories flooded back. That's why I journal.

I have a thing with odd numbers, especially odd years. They are never my best. This ranked as our second hardest year yet, right behind twenty twelve which still holds the blue ribbon. Oddly, it hasn't felt like a hard year. The difference: we've leaned more on Jesus than ever and He has been carrying us through.

Rewind to March. March was a game changer for me. I'm not quite sure of the exact date, but March was when I found myself at the alter of my church one random weekday after work. For a while I felt God calling me to deeper waters, to go further in my faith with Him. My sweet friend Shelly was beside me and I remember praying with every fiber of my being. I have never prayed like that before or since. I think that was one of the defining prayers of my life, in a way.

I prayed anything. Anything. Anything. Lord, I'll do anything.

Don't pray anything like that unless you are ready for what's in store. For the majority of my Christian walk I've lived according to my dreams and plans and did my best to mold Jesus to fit me. It wasn't until March that I realized how futile that is and how it has hindered me. I surrendered everything to God and prayed for anything.

By Summer my husband was praying anything with me as well. We put everything on the altar, nothing was off limits. Slowly, bit by bit Jesus started whispering His will and desires for us. We committed to turn from everyday Christian fans into devoted Followers.

Now here we are, at the end of the year and we are following.

I'm following by being a wife and mother and nurturing my family in Christ.

We are following by growing and studying with a small group of fellow followers.

We are following by putting our home on the market in the hopes of selling it in order to pursue an adoption.

My life today is completely different than a year ago. My views and thoughts are being changed each day to fit Jesus' desires for me. It's not always easy. Being a SAHM or adoption were never written in my planner, but on the tough days I remind myself that I prayed for anything. This is His anything for me at the moment.

The potter's wheel is never an easy place to be. There's nothing pleasant about God's pruning process. But I've never felt closer to Him than I do now. And that is worth more.

Two thousand thirteen was our year for falling in love with Jesus. It has been a year of change for us and this new year looks to bring even more changes our way. Looking back at how I've grown since last year, I'm so glad I am on the path I'm traveling.